thursday tv and urban music:

Last night, we decided to give 'Alias' one more shot and recorded 'Smallville' to watch later (plus I flipped back to 'Everybody Hates Chris' during commercials). 'Smallville' did not disappoint, finally moving forward with the story, and giving me nostalgic warm fuzzies. It's increasingly violent, though. Boy, how many ways can Lana Lang be beaten up in a series?

As for 'Alias,' we'd already heard unconfirmed reports that Michael Vartan was leaving the show after this season. Losing Vaughn means this will probably be our last season watching it (p.s. we don't know if he's dead, but as most things go on the show, it was probably staged). Yeah, I said that two years ago, though. Sydney is not as much of a draw, not because she's pregnant, but it's hard to separate the character Sydney from the real-life Bennifer 2: Electric Boogaloo (borrowing a term from Vh1). Some of our friends had an 'Alias' party last night. Now with a baby needing to sleep at home, I don't get out much. It doesn't really bother me anymore. I'm not as lonely as I was when Naomi was just born. Naomi's more interactive now, plus the internet helps quite a bit.

I don't watch much TV during the day because of the baby, but one of these days hopefully I'll catch Hip Hop Honors on Vh1. I still listen to old school once in a while. Back when I was growing up at the border of Long Beach/Compton, I was in the middle of it. Now I'm out of that scene and can't relate. A lot of urban music today, if it is music, isn't really the same anyway. Just my dos pesos.

photo time:

Here are our photos from September 2005.

I've...almost...got 'em... (at Denny's)

thanks but no thanks:

Last week, we started letting Naomi cry a bit longer at night and not feeding her. It's been a few nights now and really it seems to be getting worse, so we decided to do one thing at a time. We decided we won't feed her between midnight and 6 am, which is working, but we will tend to her if her crying goes for too long until she's a bit older. On Saturday, Manny's aunt, uncle, and cousin visited in the afternoon. Naomi had not slept well and only took 25 minute nap that morning (she skipped the afternoon naps altogether), but she was happy and smiling. (How in the world is this the same baby that was colicky just a couple months ago?) I'm still working on her routine/schedule, but we have to employ our best judgment.

A number of my mom friends give me the old, "Well, Amy, the key is..." and "You know, Amy..." followed by something that conflicts with another mom's advice. I take it all with a grain of salt now. There isn't anything that they've suggested that I haven't already tried and put my all into. I am grateful for the advice, and they mean well, but it's more the delivery that affects me. Plus, it's amplified with my running on adrenalin for 5 months. Okay, I get it, we're all experts on children! :P But every child is different. Otherwise there wouldn't be a point in my being with Naomi all day.

I shouldn't complain, though. I know I've been worse, wise in my own eyes, leaning on my own understanding, giving advice condescendingly. One of the wonderful blessings about being with Manny is really what I've discovered about myself through his wisdom. We have the best conversations. I also enjoy talking to Cecille (Naomi's middle namesake) a couple times a week -- it's refreshing to talk about different topics. And if she does have any advice, there is always humility and kindness in it. Man, what a friend. :) Well, she doesn't have kids, but even if she did, something tells me she'd be the same way.

tv:

I recently started watching TV again, just in time for some premieres. The other night I was flipping through the channels and saw someone that looked like a former coworker on 'House Hunters' (HGTV) -- then they said her name and it WAS her! I feel kind of strange seeing her family and house on TV, like I now know more about her than I should. Well, $12.41/mo for basic cable and most of it goes to news, Travel Channel, and HGTV.

'Smallville' starts next week. This should finally be the Clark vs. Lex season. No more footall, yay. I'm watching 'Lost' now as well. Manny had been watching it, but now I've jumped on the bandwagon. A surprise hit for me is 'Everybody Hates Chris.' It reminds me so much of my childhood, down to the actual situations. Hey, anything that makes me laugh about my childhood is fine by me. And Manny and I were big Wonder Years fan, too.

We'll have to tape 'Chris' and watch 'Smallville' for the remainder of the season. Yes, we have a VCR instead of Tivo. *gasp* Just minimizing our monthly expenses.

five months old:

(This was started on Monday)
Happy 5-Month Birthday to our little Naomi! At this point, she's recognizing her name, but not sitting up yet. I love to watch her change everyday. I like the way she crinkles her nose before attacking something with her mouth (like Daddy's head or her big toe), how she smiles after she sneezes, and how her cheeks look like juicy peaches when she sleeps. I like the way she holds on to her feet, even when I pick her up. I love her puppy dog eyes, especially when she (finally) starts to get tired. And, of course, there's so much more.

The other day I was browning some ground beef and had a flashback to when I was nine, standing on a stepping stool, making hamburgers for my brother and myself. My mom, then a waitress, had to work in the evenings. My dad was unavailable at the time (euphemism), and so we were latchkey kids in the worst sense. Then I was back in the present, looking at Naomi and telling her that her father and I would do everything we could to raise her in a decent home.

As for me, I wasn't able to see a doctor right away (no one had appointments available until end of Oct), so my ob/gyn just evaluated me over the phone and called in a prescription for antibiotics. Right now, the lump is shrinking and I'm feeling better. I could just use a bit more sleep, but I'm sure it'll come when I need it most.

At R&S's wedding reception at Greens Restaurant in San Francisco.

under the weather:

We started Naomi on solids two days shy of her 5-month birthday. She was very ready (photos below). Didn't do much for improving her sleep as far as that myth goes. But the timing is good since I'm having some nursing issues these past few days.

I seem to have come down with mastitis, a breast infection. On Wednesday, I felt some pain, but nothing unusual. Then Thursday morning, I felt like I just ran a marathon (or how I imagine that to feel). By that afternoon, after I did some chores, I felt like I'd hit a brick wall (or how I imagine that to feel). Thursday night I slept only two hours. The rest of the time was spent oscillating between fevers and chills and also trying to pacify a very awake Naomi throughout the night/morning. Anyway, it's a good thing Peg wrote about mastitis when she had it, so I could at least have some clue what was happening. You never know how what you write on your journal/blog could be used to help someone else!

It wasn't all bad. Manny made and brought me breakfast in bed on Friday and helped out a lot. :) I actually stayed in bed all of Friday with Naomi. I couldn't move my arms much, so I kept rolling and repositioning her during her "activity" time. Couldn't trick her for long though, haha. Every part of me hurt, even my toes and fingers. I do feel a lot better now. At least the flu-like symptoms are almost gone. I just have to get the lump checked out as soon as I get all the insurance logistics squared away.

solid foods:

First time eating solids (although rice cereal gravy isn't very solid).


Trying to feed herself.


*thumbs up* She loves it!

Happy Birthday, Peg!!!! (sorry about that caption - i took the photo from a scrapbook site)

what i know now (more on motherhood):

Things I never thought I'd do:
--Put my nose right against my baby's bottom to check for #2.
--Pick her nose.
--Nurse in public (with a blanket, though).
--Love baby sounds so much.
--A family tree project.
--Talk so ridiculously (you're my little chubby one kenobi, my poochie susan lucci, etc.)

I'm also surprised that:
--I have not dropped her on her head (I'm being serious).
--Changing diapers has been the easiest part of being a new mom so far.
--The slowest 3 months of my life could be followed by months that are starting to fly by.
--We're thinking about the next kid(s) already!

Last night, Discovery Channel had a powerful special on Flight 93 called, "The Flight That Fought Back." It was so moving to see them as fathers, mothers, and children, rather than a body count. It was heartbreaking and triumphant all at once. At one point, I had my mouth gaping open and when I looked down, Naomi was smiling up at me (it takes a couple hours or so to get her to calm down at night). What a strange feeling -- she's totally oblivious. How will I explain these horrific things to Naomi? What a tremendous responsibility Manny and I have been given, to train her to live effectively in this fallen world.

a pink jedi knight?

september:

I can't believe it has been four years already. It's not the kind of anniversary you want to celebrate, but it's important to remember and be humbled. I remember going home and crying. For me, grieving didn't mean I doubted God's goodness, but that I really needed Him more knowing what we were capable of doing to ourselves.

It has been two weeks since the catastrophe in the south. And not until I watched the opening of the telethon Friday did I feel that level of grief again. The networks played a slideshow of images against the song, "Wake Me Up When September Ends." At that moment, we remember that this is all reality, not an editorial piece or internet political forum/chatroom.

Our pastor today reminded us that the government is not our saviour. That we can't be watching these scenes on the news like they are some form of entertainment. That grief was a right response. As is prayer, giving, and even mobilizing out to the south to physically help them. And he encouraged us to be ready for the questions, mainly, why would God allow this to happen? (we can have an email exchange if you'd like to talk to me about it)

And re: Kanye West's comments, don't you think it's strange how (at least from what I've seen) the media keeps replaying the shocker line that our president doesn't care about a certain race, but continuously omits the part where he lashed out at them (the media) about their bifurcate portrayal of the people of the south? Anyway, however you feel about it, I guess someone was bound to bring this up.

Life will continue to spring forth, though -- congrats to Mark and Dianne on baby #3, Joseph Daniel, born Friday, who turned out to be a boy though the u/s said "girl."

misc update:

My mom now has heart problems in addition to her high blood pressure and high blood sugar. For those that do, please pray for her to be disciplined in her diet, for some relief from family demands, and for her to receive the truth.

Naomi's digestion seems to be improving wonderfully, and she's gaining weight more steadily now. She's been having a lot of trouble sleeping, even more so than usual. She seems to have a minor cold, but nothing severe. She's not really a newborn anymore. Very thankful that Manny and I have a strong union as new parents.

I just found out that the people that reported to me will probably be cut in the next round of lay-offs. :( They're going to switch the function to another director and bring in higher-level people to replace them. Supposedly they said higher-level workers will have a reputation of "getting the job done." Not among the realists, they won't.

I'm not posting birthdays anymore, except to those that are part of my reads list. I will report, though, that our friends Brian and Vanessa had a baby girl (yay!) named Carissa Wei-En and are doing well.

Our church pastor sent out letters to us regarding the Katrina aftermath, encouraging us not to participate in the blame game, as difficult as that is, and to forego that new CD or other luxury item to help give to those in need in the South. I was just thinking how I don't have all the facts to form a decisive opinion. Apparently New Orleans had a plan and didn't execute to it (from endo), yet the President seems to have such a strong "no regrets/apologies" policy (which makes me cringe a bit, even though I do support him in general). I've also stopped following it so closely with all the crazy stories in the media, showing floating bodies left and right. So really all I can do is help however I can and let the investigators get to the bottom of it.

picasa/hello is workin again - now you can click for larger photos.

With Dave, Miae, and Nathan at Pizz'a Chicago.


I like this picture, even though I'm looking at Dave's Palm instead of the camera (plus I'm wearing yellow, an Asian no-no).


There were other people, but no more photos. Naomi got fussy and then fell asleep.

quick questions:

What's the purpose of the zippers on the sides of my city sweats?

Can someone explain the Crab Simmons storyline and 'Prison Break'? I keep missing those parts.

Do Christians generally name godparents for the children?

Email me or leave a comment, muchas gracias.

squirrels and chickens and dogs:

Sydney and Carter with Naomi at the Lees' Labor Day BBQ.


Naomi's first time "drinking" out of the sippy cup.

We had a great weekend. Now that I'm at home, holidays mean more time with Manny rather than less time at the office. On Saturday, Manny worked on taking down the wallpaper in the guest room and blocking off the squirrels by putting bricks at the edge of our tile roof. Unfortunately, it sounds like mama squirrel was out and baby squirrel's stuck inside. Manny set up a squirrel trap in the attic, so hopefully the baby will leave the area over the vaulted ceiling and go into the attic. Then we can set it free to be with its mama. I was thinking at first how much I dislike that they eat dove's eggs, but then I realized we just had chicken eggs for breakfast. Oh well.

Sunday after church, Bryan and Orawin came over again for lunch. I don't know why they still like hanging out with us. I'm almost brain-dead half the time and sometimes have to exit abruptly to tend to Naomi. And Manny and I are kind of boring, I think. A lot of people tell me we're "mellow" or "calm," but I think that boils down to boring. But Manny's a caring listener and always smiling, so maybe they all just want to hang out with him and not me. :) Or maybe they want to use Naomi as practice for parenting. :)

Monday night, we went to Roland and Melinda's for a BBQ with a few other folks. It was a blast, all kinds of tasty chicken, and even apple-chicken sausage (which I love). And quite a few children there. Their son Carter is already the same size as Naomi, and she's two months older.

Speaking of chickens, my mom brought me a few blackened/silkie chickens to make soup (they're $2-$3 cheaper down south). That's all fine and good, but I was horrified to find that the heads were still intact. That means I have to chop it off. I felt like crying, but I have to eat it. Ugh.

Manny's parents received a golden Cocker Spaniel for free. It looks just like their late beloved Bud. They decided to name it Chuey, one of Manny's suggestions. I asked what Chuey was short for, and Manny said it's "short" for Jesse. Haha. Oh well, it's just like Pancho is the nickname for Franc(isco?). Go figure. Anyway, it's awkward -- he's not a replacement for Bud, but he's just like him. My family never got another dog after ours died because his life and death were so tragic. It took a while to get over that feeling myself, but I think I'm ready for another dog. In a few years.

happy days:

Adrian! (Rocky)


She will only go in the swing for a photo, then she's done.

Since I learned to cherish and love Naomi despite the colic, now when she smiles or laughs, I'm overcome with surprise and joy. I hope I never lose that appreciation. Dare I say it? -- I think we actually have a happy baby! Sometimes I put her down and she just stares off into space and smiles. She still smiles and cries at the same time sometimes, like a battle of the two Naomis. I'm secretly cheering Happy Naomi on.

Updates:
Weight: 13 1/2 lbs
Habit mom likes: When she grabs daddy's face and tries to bite his nose.
Habit mom doesn't like: Digging into her head and yanking her hair.
Feeding: Teething, hunger strike, but getting back to "normal."
Sleeping: Wrestle with Soothe her for 1-3 hours at bedtime and then every so often at night.
Napping: Not easy. Tried just about every method known to man and now resort to letting her cry it out (but not more than 10 minutes).
Reflux: Improving, but still not fun to witness.

Here's the list of parenting books I've read. How did I find time to read them? Most books were read and re-read during her colic months, with her screaming in my ear while I was walking in circles or bouncing on the ottoman, holding her in one hand and the book in the other. When you're desperate, you suddenly discover new skills. :)

Along the Infant Way (Babywise) - Ezzo - agree with philosophy, didn't work
The Baby Whisperer Solves All Your Problems - Hogg - don't agree with half the book
Happiest Baby on the Block - Karp - tried it all, didn't work that well
Your Fussy Baby - Weissbluth - good stuff on colic, cry it out
Healthy Sleep Habits, Happy Child - Weissbluth - ditto
What to Expect the First Year - Some nurses - helpful in some cases
Home Grown Kids - Moore - practical and helpful, but intro is questionable
Shepherding a Child's Heart - Tripp - good for later on

What a wake-up call the Katrina aftermath has been for us. Or at least I hope that's the case.

snippets:

The series premiere of 'Prison Break' will be on Fox again tonight. We saw it Monday, with only a couple interruptions from our dear insomniac of a daughter. Wentworth Miller will make that show successful, I think, and compensate for Purcell's "very passionate" acting (sorry - remember 'John Doe'?). I'll add it to 'So You Think You Can Dance' and bring the number of shows I currently watch up to two.

Wuxia in the news.

I'm now 8 lbs over my pre-preg weight. The wedding band is back on, but I can't fit well into anything except my workout clothes (so ironic). I know I said I wouldn't buy any clothes this year, but I can't even fit into my jacket! So I bought a $20 hooded sweater coat and two medium-sized shirts. I guess I have to resign myself to the fact that I must kiss size 2-3 Petite and size small goodbye.

For Jenni: I got From Fear to Freedom...so far, it's so good!

Naomi update next time.