father's day weekend:

Manny spent most of Father's Day weekend just being a good dad and getting a lot of errands done.  Friday night he came home with an Italian hoagie and curly fries from a Philly cheeseteak shop.  This particular hoagie actually brings me back to my childhood in Jersey/Pennsylvania.  During the weekend, he also picked up his suit for my cousin's wedding, had a haircut, got an oil change for my car, and took Naomi and Lucas to see Inside Out.  On Saturday, our church had the first of our annual summer picnics.   For Father's Day, I had made a photo book from our recent trip, but being cheap, I didn't want to get it without a big discount, so I will have to get it to him later.  Naomi more than made up for it with a homemade card and present.  She gave him the 7-in-1 screwdriver she received from Tech Camp and a Jamba Juice card she received as a prize a while ago.  She also wrote an acrostic on his card:

Faithful

Athletic

Teacher

Helpful

Encouraging

Respectable

We both chuckled a little at athletic, but I definitely agree with the rest.  He does work out, so one could consider that athletic.  Happy Father's Day (I know I'm publishing this way late) to my dad, my father-in-law, and my husband.  Manny is of course a devoted father, even if we don't always see eye-to-eye about parenting.  My father-in-law is a loving father and grandfather who will do anything for his loved ones.  My dad has done things perhaps no one would be proud of, and he wasn't always around, but he is still my father.  I will always show him honor and respect as such.

There are a few too many peppers, but otherwise, this hoagie is spot on.

Naomi usually eats with others, which I encourage.

It took a few tries this time, but she got it!

Swingin' good time.

pool party:

We had a pool party with a few of Naomi's friends last Friday afternoon.  They weren't allowed to swim during Naomi's birthday party and wanted to, so we took a rain check.  It was a relaxed day with just a few people and a little pizza, sides, frozen treats, and drinks.  I made sure to clear the time and number of guests with the HOA.  I know sometimes people don't like to deal with HOAs, but I really appreciate our HOA and how they make sure things run smoothly.  I don't mind at all that they double-check after we clean up and come by to check on our parties.  I appreciated that our HOA secretary/treasurer said the kids at the party were really well-behaved (and they were).  I actually forgot to lock the door between the clubhouse and the restrooms this time, so really glad they caught that.  Usually Manny reminds me, but he was of course at work on Friday.  Also, the pool cleaner came that day, so I'm glad one of the HOA came by our party to tell me.  I would have liked Manny to be there to see the fun and also just to have some help, but Friday was easier.  Many of us are busy on Saturdays with extracurricular activities, and I didn't want to deal with the Saturday crowd either.  

We have a nice variety of pool toys, some thanks to Grandma.  Some years ago, Naomi wanted the floating dolphin (and so did I), but we'd never been able to figure out how to get on it and maintain balance, at least not until this party.  Naomi's friend's brother didn't want to come, but his mom made him.  I noted to him that no one had figured out the dolphin yet.  Up for the challenge, he got right on and had no trouble at all.  After that, he and Lucas shot each other with squirt guns (again, thank you, Grandma!) and had fun with that.  The girls did not like being shot as much.  I told Lucas not to shoot S. (the dolphin boy) in the face, but he said he was fine with it, so they just shot each other almost point blank.  Boys will be boys.  I'm very happy to see Lucas opening up so much socially, and I think that confidence will just build on itself.

The first couple of friends arrive.

Super simple food--Costco pizza, California rolls, edamame, veggie sticks, and some of favorite fruits from Trader Joe's (Rainier cherries, lychees, kumquats, and green grapes).

Trying to take a photo with all three on the inner tube wasn't easy.

The girls about to jump in again.  I couldn't leave Isaac, so I took most of the photos from the same spot.

S. had no trouble figuring out the dolphin.

Lucas liked the inner tube.

Isaac still fits in this floater, and loved it.

The boys and their squirt guns.

Costco sells these frozen whole fruit juice pops that are like push-ups.

Naomi finally got it as well.  Lucas just along for the ride.  :)

triple birthday party:

Not only was it K's birthday, but her husband and son's birthday all in the same week!  They had a triple celebration barbecue at their house.  Isaac is still talking about going to his friend J's house.  Most of the adults were either watching the NBA finals (go, Warriors!) or watching the kids play Rock Band on the other TV.  We did get to meet a few people who weren't doing either.  Naomi just hung out with other little girls.  Lucas played in the jumphouse almost the entire time, sometimes with the older kids and sometimes the toddlers.  There was one older boy whom he said was almost punching him, but Manny and I could tell Lucas was being a little annoying toward him as well.  Not that I wouldn't step in if he hit Lucas, but Lucas also has to learn how to interact with older boys as well.  

Relaxing in their hammock.  Isaac is always asking for one now.

Lucas played a lot of games in the jumphouse with the other kids there.  

We love a summer barbecue!

Lucas doesn't like frosting, but he's just making a face on purpose.

Isaac on the other hand likes the frosting more than the cake.

misc catch up / summer classes:

Lucas has been doing well with his tutoring so far.  I love hearing how he actually chats and jokes with her and is not shy at all.  In our hurried and superficial world, sometimes we just don't give people enough of a chance.  I've had adults tell me he's nonverbal and should be tested or put in school just because he doesn't open up to them.  Well, maybe he can sense how prejudiced they are, so why bother?  Social savvy is a wonderful skill to possess, but extroversion is overrated.  

He was tested in the past two weeks by both the dyslexia tutor and a music specialist (for a music therapy assessment), and it was really interesting that the test results were so similar even though the tests were so different.  He was above average in being able to repeat rhythms or patterns, whether clapping or nonsense words, but slightly below average in most other areas (won't get into them all here).  Nothing was glaring to the point where remedial work and therapy would not be able to help him.  Both said one thing is that his processing time is fairly long.  This is a little like Manny, who tends to think things through to really get them right.

Thankfully Manny was able to stay home with Naomi and Isaac while I took Lucas to the music therapy assessment.  I don't know if we'll do the therapy; it depends on our insurance coverage.  Isaac cried most of the time I was gone, but he told me later that he felt happier when Chris showed up.  Manny and Chris went to see Jurassic World like many, many people that weekend.  It sounds like they liked it.

We've been enjoying summer so far.  It's flying by, really.  Naomi has aikido and piano and just finished up Tech Camp (not technology but stage production work for a local theater).  She has just one more camp coming up.  Lucas of course has tutoring and his music class.  He's getting along well with the other two boys in the class.  Naomi and Lucas also have swimming classes coming up.  Isaac always cries about not having a class.  I do have plans to get him into preschool enrichment classes and activities when the time comes, but right now we can't take on more classes.

We made a stop at church to give some birthday flowers to our children's director.  She does so much for others and has worked so hard as the children's/nursery director, filling in as the co-director moved away.  She honestly deserves more than flowers, but I'm glad the kids and I got to brighten her day a little.  

We also went suit shopping for Manny for my cousin's wedding.  He hasn't worn a suit in over a decade.  He recently lost some weight.  I appreciate how hard he's been working on getting fit despite very long work hours.  I really should follow suit.  I'm fairly active, but not really that fit anymore.  Also when I'm busy, I eat a lot of junk, and I've been pretty busy!  

Yay, a sandbox!

Happy birthday, K!  (I know N wears pink a lot, but her favorite color is actually lime green.)

Isaac trying to help me clean.

At the music center for Lucas' assessment.

Naomi's last day of Tech (as in tech crew) Camp at the Mission Center for Performing Arts.

Each student was paired with another to come up with a backdrop for a play.  Naomi and her partner chose Alice in Wonderland.

Naomi's make-up design for the Cheshire Cat and Caterpillar of Alice in Wonderland.

Isaac brought Naomi's purse and a church bulletin to Trader Joe's.  When I asked him what for, he said they were for shopping (they're the tote and the shopping list--haha).

larissa's new album:

My friend Larissa's new album Love & Discovery is finally out after four years.  It has a little something for everyone.  The album is only $5.99 this week on iTunes and is out on Amazon as well if you'd like to show some support for her as an independent and up-and-coming artist (and a fantastic friend, wife, and mom).  She needs to sell about 1,000 copies on iTunes to chart, and I'm hoping she does.

Her first single is the upbeat "I Feel Alive."  Even though I'm not a huge electronic dance music fan, it's nice to have a clean and uplifting EDM song in this day and age.  There are some slower gems on the album like "The First Day," "Paralyzed," and "Wonder Woman," and hopefully there's enough buzz and profit to generate budget for more videos.



ETA:  Here is the video she released today for graduation.  My bestie and I make an appearance at 2:30.

what they don't teach in school part 1:

I missed the last two months for mid-month ramblings, but I am back with my two cents.  I'd like to start a series about what "they" (who's they?) don't teach in school.  I'm only going to write about about everyday material things, so things like intelligent design will have to wait for another day.  It will help me think about teaching these to my children if I have not already.  I'm sure many teachers actually do teach on these topics and skills, but based on what I've seen and heard, it's not universal.  It's easy enough to find this information online nowadays, but if they were taught in school, it wouldn't be passive and the importance would be highlighted.  These are just random thoughts, so there is no real order or organization to this, but perhaps I'll think about making a finalized topical list in the (distant) future.  I plan to write about three or four at a time.  I like to do less important things in moderation, which means I usually give myself a limit on time or effort to accomplish something.  So here it goes.  I welcome any comments.

1.  How to write a check / bank terminology

I learned how to write a check watching Bob Barker.  I'd seen those giant checks given out for lotteries or Publisher's Clearinghouse, but I never looked beyond the dollar amount.  The Check Game on "The Price is Right" gave me a closer look.  It was the one game I imagined dreading if I ever landed on the show.  Now checks are becoming more obsolete, but we should still know how to write one.

Along those lines, schools should about money orders, cashier's checks, wire transfers, checking vs. savings accounts, interest, principle, profits, margins, balances, etc.  I believe knowing how money is transferred helps us manage it better.  I did learn a lot in my math and economics courses, but I don't think application to daily life was very straightforward.  We focused largely on stock market and economic history.  Finance classes also shouldn't be reserved for college.

2.  The parts of a car

Not only do we put machines of death in the control of hormonal and naive teenagers, but usually the first cars are used or cheaper models.  We assume that when it breaks down, Mom or Dad take care of it.  But how many of us ever drove with our parents as teens?   Even moms don't know all there is to know in order to not be cheated at a mechanic or make an easy fix themselves.  Everything I knew about cars as a teen came from cars around me breaking down.  I had a lot of male friends at school and work, so they also explained a lot to me, half of which went completely over my head because I lacked foundation and a mental picture.  At the very least, we should all know how to check under a hood and troubleshoot a bit.  We probably should know how to check oil, jumpstart a car safely, and how to change a flat.  I've done all of these, but still depend largely on AAA.  We probably also should have an idea how much fixing anything should actually cost.  It helps to know an honest mechanic.

3.  Manners

We can no longer rely on parents to teach children manners.  With each generation we seem to lose some.  Also, manners between cultures can be very different.  In the Chinese culture, for example, it is fine for men to burp at the table to show how much they enjoyed a meal.  Chinese are unfortunately generally known for being unhygienic and rude, perhaps due to the culture and the population density.  You also don't stick chopsticks in rice upright, because it looks like a grave.  You must never give anything wrapped in white, or you're basically telling the recipient they're going to die.  You usually take your shoes off upon entering a home and give the host/ess a gift.  I guess this would make for a fun post itself.  I don't expect people in the U.S. to bow to one another.  So here I mean Western manners.  I myself learned my manners in a military camp, no kidding.  It was a camp for some the top female JROTC students in the country, and I got selected one year.  I learned how to sit down in a chair, how to hold a spoon to drink soup, where elbows and feet should and should not go, and how to start a conversation.  I would still say I don't always have the best manners, especially at home, but I absolutely believe manners are important, because they are a way of showing respect to others.  And call me Americanized, but I do prefer American manners.

So there you have the first three off the top of my head.

summer playdate at magical bridge:

Last week we went to this newly-opened-to-the-public, privately-funded playground for special needs children with my friend and her two kids.  It was blazing hot, but we managed with some partial shade and water.  It was really fun for the kids, and I'd love to go back on a cooler day.  It's a little out of the way for me, too, but there aren't too many parks like it around.  Manny and I had recently half-lamented the disappearance of merry-go-rounds (those metal spinners we stood on and sometimes flew off), but this park has two of them, one similar to the kind we grew up with, and the other a tall tent of sorts.  Lucas and Isaac loved that one, and it's made of ropes so it wasn't too hot.  The park also uses rubber instead of tanning bark or sand, so as not to cause problems for children who don't like the feeling of it on their feet.  The park also features music, enclosed swings so older handicapped children can swing, and a fun and safe playhouse.

My friend brought a few water balloons and squirt bottles to help us keep our cool.  I'd never been to the park before, so I didn't know there wouldn't be much shade.  Actually, I couldn't even find the park originally.  The park and its signs are hidden out of view of the street, which I think makes sense, too.

We were originally going to see a $1 family movie inside an air-conditioned theater, but just as we were about to leave, my friend texted that they hadn't even gotten up yet.  If you know me, you know I make every effort to be places on time.  That is not easy with three kids and the rough night I'd had, but I did it.  Sometimes that's not reciprocated or possible for others, so I try to be an example to the kids and be gracious about it (but if it's a chronic thing, chances are I won't hang out with certain people as often).  In most cases, though, I figure if something like this didn't work out, it was for the best.  I was hesitant to go to the movie anyway with Isaac, but my friend persuaded me.  We'll still try to make a movie another day, but I'm glad we were introduced to a new park.  Most parks do not have the water turned on right now due to the drought, and the kids and I were very thankful she had some water balloons handy.  Isaac's still excited having popped them.

Her daughter liked to grab Naomi and yank her everywhere.  Naomi's always been taught to prefer others, but we let her know it was okay to speak up or pull her hand back if the girl was pulling too hard.  Isaac had too good of a time and screamed all the way back to the parking lot and would not get into his car seat.  I don't know how he can be so skinny and yet so strong, but I had to put all my might into getting him strapped in.  Sometimes you can get him in with a promise of something fun, but he was completely inconsolable.  The other two were like about leaving parks that when they were his age.  They learned, and he will, too.  And so begins our summertime playdates!

View from the playhouse.

Crossing the bridge.

All the kids (Naomi up top) about to go for a spin.  Lucas and Isaac rode this the longest.

Taking a water balloon and water break in the shade.

Four in a swing!

Wee.

He's not having fun.  No, not at all.  :)

The boys playing the bells.  Isaac hit his head pretty hard by jumping into them.

isp graduation / peer pressure:

We had our ISP graduation celebration last week.  It was very bittersweet for us.  Naomi was especially sad to not be able to see three of her best friends twice or three times a week anymore.  I will miss visiting regularly with their moms, who were the ones with home I connected best.  I stayed late after the party so she could spend extra time with two of her friends, and because Lucas was playing so well with some boys he'd met there.  Lucas came up to me and said he was sad about the two older girls graduating from the program (it goes until 8th grade).  This year would not have been the same without them.  

We brought a picnic lunch and some Rainier cherries to share.  The kids and I love us some Rainiers.  Others brought treats to share as well, but for some reason, this year felt sort of disconnected .  The park was pretty crowded, and when that happens, I usually find kids disrespecting others.  One of our boys from the ISP joined another boy in wetting sand and throwing it at these poor little girls in pretty white dresses.  These older boys shouldn't even have been in the toddler area.  They were playing with Lucas originally, but I saw that Lucas didn't want to join in what they were doing and stepped away.  I'm proud of him.  

The little girls were telling me in Spanish about the boys, just as some wet sand came flying toward us, hitting me and Isaac.  I turned to them, smiled, and asked them nicely to stop.  The other boy's mother told him to watch out.  They began again right in front of her, and she did nothing.  So, I firmly told them twice to please stop.  Our boy said to me, "You're not my mother, and you're not his either."  So I raised my voice and said I'd ask him to stop three times and now would go get his grandmother, which I did.  When I raised my voice, everyone around stopped to stare.  I hate attracting attention, but when I'm on a mission or upset, my mind isn't focused on much else.  At the park, I will usually let something go unless someone's getting hurt, but not only was I in Mama Bear mode over Isaac and these two little girls, but I know his grandmother, and this was not acceptable.  The other boy I left alone.  His mom was busy chatting with others and didn't seem to care too much.  (PS Moms, you should care.  The park is a publicly shared space, not a place to take a break from being a mom.)  His grandmother rebuked him.  I told him I forgave and loved him, and we hugged and made up.  Then she took him home.  She did the right thing.  I think he owed an apology to the girls, but I could not find them.  That was enough drama for my day.

It's been a wonderful journey for us in the program, from the first day Naomi visited the class five years ago to Lucas joining to having Isaac joining in on the last field trip.  I liked the way the program was set up in our earlier years.  With the substantial growth of the program, they've had to be creative and combine the younger and older classes.  Also, with the influx of students being pulled out of public schools rather than starting out homeschooling, it changed the dynamics.  Many students have been temporary, and others joined after their child left school due to behavioral or performance issues.  With the amount of attention they needed, I could not expect the instructors to do more with Lucas, and he was falling through the cracks.  I think the program itself was still excellent, with some wonderful art and engineering projects and field trips I could not have done myself.  I especially liked the kids getting to work with team members of different ages.  

  

I would have stayed with it if it was still the right fit, but we take things year by year.  Naomi's not particularly thrilled about going into public school, especially since her best friend is now in private school, but she is willing to go since Manny and I believe it is the direction we are being led as a family.

Naomi has made wonderful friends in the ISP, and she really puts forth effort to really get to know and connect with others.  I've also seen her grow is in regards to peer pressure.  There was a friend of hers, an older girl from a Christian home, whom I felt was not the best influence on Naomi due to certain experiences I'd had with her telling lies.  However, I let them continue to be friends, with caution.  A couple of years ago in the Lego Jr. Club, Naomi and the girl were supposed to be listening to some other students' presentations, but the girl told Naomi to go with her to play with a dog that had come to visit the class.  I shook my head no at Naomi.  She gave me a guilty look, almost like she couldn't help disobeying, and went with her friend.  That was it.  So, I pulled her out of the club (and yelled at her about the incident, which I shouldn't have).  Over time, what I said spoke to her heart, and she heeded her conscience.  Naomi decided not to follow her like the other girls did.  The girl was a natural leader, and she'd tell the other girls to lie about needing to use the restroom so they could skip class for a few minutes and chat.  Naomi, also a leader in her own way, refused to go with her.  The other girl got mad at her, but Naomi stood her ground.  She said she was her friend, but she refused to deceive the teacher.  The other girl made several attempts, with Naomi refusing each time, until finally she herself stopped.  There are good choices Naomi has made that I don't know about until Naomi or another witness mentions them to me in passing, but I continue to encourage her to always do what is right, even at the risk of losing a friendship.  If they are truly your friends, and ones whom you can trust, they will not push you to do the wrong thing.  

Lucas receiving his graduation certificate.

Naomi receiving her fourth grade certificate.  I had the boys, so I didn't get the best moment.

Parents and students at the graduation.

Cake time.  Lucas is not a fan of super sweet frosting, so he didn't each much of it.  Naomi and her friends are under a tree in the distance behind them.

One of the moms made these cute graduation treats for us.

Boys enjoying the seesaw.

Naomi and friends.

t. going home:

After church last week, Naomi wanted to have lunch at Wendy's with her friends, so we went.  We had to go with something quick anyway, since we needed to be back to get my cousin's car and leftover belongings before she headed to the airport.  We acquired ten huge garbage bags of her stuff that I need to sift through (looking for keys--talk about a needle in a haystack), sort and pack.  Thankfully I found the right keys (I hope) today!  I have finished going through half the bags and placed the items in large boxes Manny helped me get.  Hopefully her friends can help with the shipping, because I can only lift those boxes with a forklift.  My sister-in-law knows how to work one, but not me.  :)  Anyway, I agreed to do it, plus like Manny said, it's the least I can do.  We helped her sell the car to Manny's coworker, but it looks like the car has a lot more problems than any of us realized.  I felt pretty bad and she offered to refund some of the money, but he wouldn't take it.  Naomi gave her big hugs and said she'd miss her.  I know the boys will, too.  It was a sad goodbye, but she does plan to return and visit.  I wish her the best back home in Taiwan, and I'm thankful I got to know one of my cousins.  

meeting and beach day:

Last Saturday morning, I met with Lucas' new tutor at a local coffee shop/bakery.  She is wonderful, knowledgeable, and experienced.  She was a speech therapist for 15 years (so she understands his speech therapy reports) and a Barton-certified dyslexia tutor with a dyslexic child of her own.  She also happens to be my friend's pastor's wife.  I'm so thankful that we got connected, although due to the high cost of private tutoring, I will probably take over the tutoring in the fall.  I'm trained in teaching the Barton system but not yet certified.

We were supposed to go to a big surprise birthday party for my friend's wife after that, but we had a conflict and couldn't go.  I thought I would finally have a Saturday to clean, but Manny was still planning a trip to the beach, so off we went to Twin Lakes.  There was almost no parking, and the purchase of a parking permit was required.  Thankfully, we found a spot in a semi-hidden corner with a small, steep path down to the beach.  The weather was a little cold and windy that day, only in the 60s, but sunny enough to get in the water for a bit.  Isaac is still nervous near ocean water and dislikes the smell, but he loves the sand.  The waves were pretty big at times.  Naomi went in off and on to boogie board, but it was too cold to stay in.  Lucas can run in the waves for hours.

We were pretty famished after an afternoon at the beach, and there was Hawaiian barbecue nearby.  We split some food among the five of us, although Naomi got her own spam musubi.  There were two little Chinese girls, looking about Lucas' age, who were helping make the shave ice.  It reminded me of when I was little--my parents put me to work very young.  I was having a really rough day, so the weird-tasting kalua pork I got just added to it.  However, I truly was glad we went and that the kids had fun and good memories.  I did clean after we got home at maybe 6 or 7 until about 11 pm and got a lot done despite the delay and feeling really down and exhausted.  It's always hard to do things that people tell you you're no good at, especially when it's mostly all you do.  That night I thought about the calming ocean waves, like I did as a child, as I finally drifted off to sleep...  

Heading into the water.

Looks like summer, feels like winter (to this SoCal native).

I'm not sure what they were doing here.  Nice lighthouse in the background.

Manny playing catch with Lucas the Nerf way.

Isaac in the sand, and Naomi really in the sand.

Look what I caught!

Just wanted a photo of the ocean waves.

Isaac having some shave ice soup.