nacho, five months old:

I'm not exactly sure which pics I already posted.  Hopefully there are no repeats here, but sorry if there are.  Nacho is technically five months old in three days, but I have time to post now.  :)

Nacho is coming along well with his training, at least with me.  He never bites me, goes where I tell him, doesn't bark, and never even whimpers anymore.  He does, however, bite and chew on others here.  Each individual needs to put in the time to train him, and I try to tell everyone that, but they haven't been consistent.  Lucas seems to like him more and more, but Isaac is still not really thrilled about it.  Nacho chases him sometimes when he's just walking around or jumps on him.  In the beginning, he couldn't get on the couch, but now he can, so Isaac doesn't have much of a safe zone.  However, as long as I'm around, Nacho will leave him alone on command.

He's still a puppy, though, so he still wants to chew up a lot of things.  Since it's gotten colder, he now brings his chew toys in and chews them in his new area he made for himself, under the dining table.  He has a funny personality.  He likes to take boxes, rip them open till they become a flat piece of cardboard, and then dig at them.  Since we don't have soil here, he has nothing to dig, and French Bulldogs like to dig, so he just makes do.  Same with when he gets a dried pig ear or a bone--he stresses out about hiding it, especially from me, and he tries to put them in the funniest places and even motions sometimes like he's burying something.  He's funny when he drinks water.  He has to dunk his whole face in, and then the big flaps catch the water, and he drools and drips everywhere.  

I don't have recent photos of him sunbathing, but he loves to do that when the sun's out.  It rained yesterday, so he seemed a little disappointed to be all wet and not be able to get his sun time in.  Before that, it was hazy and he wasn't allowed out for too long, either.  Today the sun was shining between rainfall, and he was a happy camper.

He gets sad sometimes if I say he can't have something, especially if he can't play.  His ears go down in a submissive manner when I exclaim, "Nacho!" if I catch him about to pee or peeing in the house.  I still have to put the puppy pee pads at all the doors, where he likes to go, but he almost always poops outside now thankfully.  That was really hard when our air was hazardous.  I got sore throats and headaches taking him in and out and/or leaving the door open for him.  I didn't have the good face masks on hand, which were sold out in many places, even on Amazon.  I noticed he was also kind of lethargic.  It's been nice to see his energy come up again today and yesterday. 

He goes through these crazy spurts of energy and when he wants to play and chew on things, but most of the time, he's fairly calm.  He sleeps on his back often.  When it was getting colder, he was determined to nap on the couch.  But once I got him the sweater, he did a lot better and was willing to nap on the floor again, sometimes next to the heater.

So far, I've taught him his name, "Come," "Sit," "Crate," "Leave It," "Stay," and "Go Potty."  He knows "treat" as well, of course.  He also is starting to get "Off" and "Down," but "Down" is pretty funny.  The first time, I patted the floor and said "Down," so he tapped his paw repeatedly on the floor, too.  Oops.  Heehee.  So now I get down on the floor to demonstrate it, but there's not a lot of room, so it looks more like a cat pose (like the front half down, but back half up), so he jumps in the air and comes down and has his butt in the air, just like I do.  Haha.  But it's good enough, and he gets a treat.  He loves to roll over on his own.  I tried saying "Roll over" when he did so, but then he thought I was saying a  command something and would get confused, so I'm going to try a different strategy, like maybe doing it myself like I did with "Down."

How he lies down when he's sad.  Here he wouldn't stop chasing Isaac outside, so I had to bring him in and make him stay.

Drinking water requires his flappy cheeks to be dunked in, causing quite a splash.

Chewing on a mint bone.  He liked these for two weeks and had fresher breath, but now won't eat them anymore, so back to Nacho breath.

Aw, Nacho, are you cold?

I still don't think bulldogs are that cute, but sometimes he can be pretty darling.

First bath.  He was so good!

Waiting at the door for Manny to come in, keeping his distance from the door and sitting, like he's been trained.  We also accidentally kicked Naomi's shoes over there, but he did not chew on them.  He will, though, if I'm not around.  However, he never chews on any of my shoes, only everyone else's.

He likes to put this squeaky toy away after he's done.  Always in boxes, too.  It's another of his quirky habits.

He watches over the birds protectively and intently. 

manny's birthday:

Last Friday night, Manny's coworkers took him out to celebrate his birthday all night.  On Saturday, I went out in the morning to do errands, and later, we just had a little celebration at home.  Manny asked me not to do or get anything for him this year.  We already got a card for him before that, but I didn't do anything else.  Manny took the boys to the bakery to pick a cake together.  I made some pre-marinated steak with chimichurri sauce for dinner.  It was good, and not too much work.  I also bought some toffee shortbread cookies to share.  Later I realized we didn't even put a candle in his cake.  Manny's parents got him a Red Robin gift card, so we went on Sunday for lunch.  

I got this card before Stan Lee's passing, so it was unintentionally timely.  Isaac picked it out.

First birthday with Nacho.

Lucas had a rough day.  At least everyone's looking at the camera!

It's hard to find chothes that fit Nacho right because of his wide chest area combined with his shorter length, but this stretchy sweater from Target was perfect.

At Red Robin.  Naomi got the nachos, and I got a chicken Cobb salad with sweet potato fries.  The chicken was bomb, but they skimped on the avocado, which was under-ripened as well.

Lucas and Isaac both got grilled cheeses with fruit.  Manny got a burger.  Usually I would get a mushroom burger, but I felt like having something different.

One of Manny's coworkers gave us a dog sling.  He never even carried the boys like this.

Can't see all the shading she did on her drawing tablet, but a cute picture of Nacho Naomi drew Manny,

Nacho has been pretty cold.  In addition to affecting the air so he couldn't go outside as much, the smoke caused some haze, so he got less of his daily sunbathing time.

cc weeks 10 and 11, family presentation:

I would say Weeks 10 and 11 were the hardest weeks for me to learn the material myself well enough to teach it.  It could have had to do with just the busyness of the season and having Nacho (plus three kids), but also there was a lot to cover in these particular weeks in terms of the history sentences, science labs, music theory, and even math.  However, these were two of the most fun weeks for me.  We also had a family presentation to do.  I wanted to do a presentation on Perseverance, since it's something I think has been a theme for us through our trials and tribulations.  I wanted the boys to do a skit adapted from The Tortoise and the Hare, but they didn't want to on top of all the other stuff, so we ended up with Lucas memorizing (in a week) and reciting T.H. Palmer's "Try Try Again," and Isaac recited Galatians 6:9.  I showed some photos of our family including the pets.  I completely forgot about the boys naming their favorite things, although they weren't keen on doing that since they already presented on those things before in class.  It was fine.  I was just glad to get it over with.  We have another presentation for the second half of the year to do, on an ancient civilization. 

Some highlights in photos: 

Lucas reciting all six stanzas of "Try Try Again."  Isaac recited Galatians 6:9.

I said a little about perseverance and then showed some photos of our family.

We couldn't just make a simple paper lantern.  I had a few leftover LED lights from Naomi's New York project many years ago.  They still work!

Teaching the kids about square numbers using square tiles.  At that age, they haven't learned much about multiplication or area yet, so I thought this would be a better way to introduce squares (i.e, one make a square out of one square tile, then four tiles, nine tiles, sixteen tiles, and so on and so forth).  They memorize the squares song for the class, but our director wanted them to learn to use mathematical thinking as well, so there is more conceptual learning in our math I think than CC communities usually do. 

Isaac presenting on his little plasma ball.  I liked how he tried to explain how it worked in his own words.  He said the thing in the middle had electrical energy that it needed to get rid of, and since we stand on the ground, it wants to go through us.  Not too far off.

Owl pellets (basically a ball of hair and bones the owl couldn't digest and throws up).  We found all kinds of animal bones in the pellets.  Isaac didn't want to do any of the animal dissections.

Learning rhythm and lengths of notes.

Once we hit Week 7, I began to make the review games more rigorous.  In this one, they only received Lego pieces if they got a question right.

This was a quick drawing on a day my hands were kind of shaky from exhaustion, but shows a bit of what we were learning.  Kindergarteners can learn this, but it's not easy.  I wish I had time to make the game I wanted to show them different ways we could make four beats in a measure, but I couldn't get to it this time.

Dissecting flowers was more Isaac's cup of tea than crayfish and owl pellets.

Identifying parts of a flower.  They will come back to this in later years to learn it more in depth, but it was a good introduction.

Teaching note identification (Every Good Boy Does Fine and FACE, which some people attribute to CC, but it's actually a pretty common mnemonic device).  I had put magnets on the back of my laminated notes, and then it turned out the whiteboard was not magnetic like ours is at home.  Thankfully another mom and I were able to quickly put tape on the back.

tree lighting:

I took Isaac to a tree lighting (yes, before Thanksgiving on a weeknight) at Santana Row.  We love to see Christmas lights, and Isaac enjoys a crowd.  I don't like standing-room-only crowds and being out in the cold, but I figured I could put that aside for him for a couple of hours.  It was so nice to be able to have some Mommy-and-me time with him.  I don't do that very often anymore.  He's been a little sad since we got Nacho.  The first week after Nacho arrived, he had tears in his eyes when he talked about missing me.  I was so exhausted in the evenings I barely had energy to put him to bed, so sometimes he'd have to brush his teeth and get himself to bed without even a good night from me, or I'd sort of rush through the routine and snap at him to hurry.  Now it's gotten a little better, though Nacho still has to go out sometimes at 2 or 3 in the morning.  Isaac said he was so happy after we went.  My job of course isn't to make him happy, but I was glad we got to go and that he felt loved. 

They said the tree lighting was at 7 pm, but that really meant 45 minutes of performances and then the tree lighting at 7:45.  It was good we got there a little early, though.  I'm glad I allowed for traffic, because there was a lot of it.  At one point I had to get off the freeway and get back on.  The parking garage was filling up quickly when we arrived.  I'm glad we were able to get a decent view.  My arm was hurting for a couple of days after, because I had to hold him up for the better part of an hour.  The performances of the Nutcracker ballet, a Chinese acrobatic dance group, and another dance troupe were good.  We couldn't stay too late, so we unfortunately had to miss the Bethel Choir. 

Me and the happy boy.

I spy Snoopy!

Fun in the fake snow.

Fake snow, lights, and crowds.  Did I mention how happy he was?

Getting covered with snow while bumping and squeezing our way out.

Giant mistletoe.

church luncheon and moms group friendsgiving:

I'm finally updating more, and planning to catch up on this blog by Thanksgiving weekend!  We had a church luncheon on Veterans Day, where we heard from one of our missionary partners about their work.  There is still war going on where they are at, but you don't hear much about it in the news.  It's one of the reasons why it's good to have them come home and share with us.  He also laid out the ways short-term teams could really help them.  A war zone is probably not a place a lot of teams are willing to go, but there is definitely a need there.  Sometimes they don't really need the teams there and are looking for things for them to do, while in other places like for this family (I'm not sure I can disclose where they are), there is great need.  Naomi and I enjoyed the Mediterranean food.  Lucas had some and some pizza.  Isaac just had cheese pizza.  Manny wasn't able to make it.

Our Moms (and Dads) group had a Friendsgiving at the park on the Monday after Veterans Day (when it's usually observed, but Manny's company doesn't give a day off).  The fires had hit the week before, and the air was still smokey, but it was windy enough that the alert had gone down and we were able to go.  Now it's been pretty bad again, and we've been cooped up and not feeling well when exposed to too much air.  The news reported that we have the worst air in the world right now due to all the smoke from the fires and the lack of wind and rain.  I can't imagine the loss of the people affected by all the fires.  A friend of a friend is still missing.

In light of that, we know we have much to be thankful for.  We had the kids sit in a circle and say what they were thankful for, and then the adults said something as well.  It's hard for me to be put on the spot, but you never know when you might share something that may help someone else.  I'm just not a very focused thinker and usually have a hundred things on my mind.

I got assigned the turkey, and I know I'm thankful I could just go to Boston Market and buy some turkey slices!  I compared it to buying the same quantity of turkey breast at the grocery store, and it wasn't that much more for them to also cook it, slice it, and provide the gravy, too.  The men who attended made some delicious food.  Yay for them!  It was a great time, and the boys managed to make it through all of it without fighting, until it was time to go back to the car.  But not bad at all.  I came back and played chess with Lucas and a board game with Isaac as promised (reward for them not fighting).  Then I got all stressed out trying to prep dinner and get Naomi to her lessons in time.  But it was a good day.

They served Mediterranean food at the church lunch.  😍

Thanksgiving circle.  Isaac's shirt appropriately said, "Thankful for Today."

One of three tables of food.  The men made some good food, too, including a delicious Singaporean laksa and this amazing savory sweet potato casserole.

Thankful for friends at Friendsgiving!

Manny got this ginger beer.  It's pretty good.  I had some while playing a few rounds of chess with Lucas.

fall cooking:

The sugar pie pumpkins we received yielded a lot of pumpkin puree, and I didn't feel like doing a whole lot of baking this year, so I actually made more savory recipes with it than baked goods.  But two of Naomi's friends came over, so I did bake some pumpkin blondies for them.  Chris was also in town that weekedn.  When you bake with the puree, you have to strain the water out, so that's also another reason I prefer putting it in soups and chili.  The pumpkins were small enough I could quarter them and put them directly into my pressure cooker.  It's easier than roasting them in the oven, but the skin does come out softer, so you could end up doing more peeling than scooping.  My Instant Pot is still going strong.

Needed to use up my basmati rice and mint.  Enter:  Chicken biryani.

Puree from one of the pumpkins.

Chicken, pumpkin, and sage soup (this recipe, but substituted chicken for ham and omitted onion and wine for our family).

I always make turkey pumpkin chili this time of year.  It's usually well-received (except by Isaac the Vegetarian).  I don't have a recipe for this one.

I got 2 lbs of ground turkey on sale for $5.  I seldom make meatloaf, but doing this in the IP and then broiling was a quick and delicious way to use it all up (recipe).

Pumpkin blondies with chocolate and no chocolate (for Lucas).  I think I prefer them with the canned pumpkin, which makes them a little more dense, but these were still good.

winter concert / special child:

Lucas and I drove an hour or more round trip every Sunday for a month to rehearse for our upcoming concert.  I say "our," because his instructor again asked me to play in it.  The instructor is a big advocate of parent participation, so I saw three more moms join us this year.  He also had me stand up and co-lead one part of the concert.  I didn't feel ready for it, and had messed up at least once every rehearsal, but somehow came through without a mistake at the concert.  The concert was really good, and I wish we had invited more people, though it was far and difficult for people to make.  We had Chinese and Indian classical music and dance performances, a hymn, a Mexican song, and a choir.  I was sad even the people who said they'd come didn't.  Manny had to work for a part of the time (although he has a hard time with classical music anyway, as I learned only after 20 years together), so Naomi had to stay behind with Isaac and the puppy, even though she wanted to come.  So, I'm also sad there's no video, or at least not until the church media folks complete and send it.  Lucas did great.  His instructor said the setup crew messed up a lot of his requests, so that was unfortunate.  For example, they didn't put mics in front of the choir, so we could barely hear them.

One of the surprising joys I've had as a mom is bonding with Lucas over things only he and I do together.  That includes violin, as well as chess and Monopoly.  I would love to tell you it's been pure joy being a parent of a special needs child, but no, it's been taxing, heartbreaking, overwhelming at times, and I believe it drove one of many wedges into my relationship with Manny.  I knew God was there, but I felt alone in this new, seemingly barren world.  I'm not trying to be dramatic; it was probably worse than I can describe it here.  I fantasized about sending him away to Grandma's or a boarding home.  I punished him for things I didn't know he couldn't help.  I faulted him for others' criticisms even as his greatest advocate.  I tried to be strong for the family, for him, but I grieved for maybe a year or more over knowing life would never be the same again.  Naomi loved him so well, or as best as she could, but even she couldn't handle him at times.  I can't judge Manny's heart, but I felt that I had to get Lucas help all on my own, and that I took the brunt of the pain, since I was with him day in and day out.  Manny is the type of person that takes care of his friends with handicaps or depression or whatever, and I felt resentment at first that he did not seem to see the seriousness of his own son's situation.  But I had to let that go and focus on what I knew to be true and to help our son.

I jumped from one district to another seeking help.  I finally found a loophole to get him tested in another district.  This district did not seem to fully believe me when I said I tried for years to get him help in our own district to no avail (after the first year, which was great, but then the speech and language pathologist left, and then they did away with the special needs program altogether at the elementary school, busing the kids elsewhere).  When it came time for the big meeting, my district was supposed to send two representatives, had confirmed, and then didn't even show up.  This other district couldn't believe it.  I'd hate to say I told you so, but...  What I was told by our district was that Lucas was too high-functioning for the services they offered, and his disorders were too specialized for their personnel to handle.  It was better to go private.  And so we did, and insurance would not cover much after he turned five.  So, I am thankful for God's provision, for the wonderful therapists he's had (except one of them), and for Manny working hard so that we could even afford the help we've received so far.  I wonder how those without the funds get children the help they need.  It was lonely wherever we went.  The ISP could not accommodate his needs and asked us to consider another program.  The dyslexia tutor could address the dyslexia, but not his inability to process language and social cues.  He didn't have many kids he could get along with in our different groups.  And if he had to go, I had to go with him.  At last, where we are now, and where he himself is at, I find we are making huge strides.

So we still have some bad moments, but overall, Lucas and I have healed a lot, and I am still going to fight for him, to be his advocate, and to keep helping him do the basic daily things that many of us take for granted, things I'll never take for granted again.  I may have had a lot of losses, but I've gained even more through being his mom.

I only have pics from the rehearsals and before and after the concert so far:

One of our many Sunday afternoons rehearsing.

All dressed up and ready to go (I fixed his gig line later when we got there--had to hurry into the car).

We got to sit next to each other this time for the concert!  Last time, I took the photo with him, but we were actually seated separately.

The choir on stage with our orchestra at rehearsal.

Rehearsing the Chinese drum/Mulan dance performance.  We were not part of the advanced strings who played for that one, so we watched the rehearsal.  She came out in full Chinese attire later.

Enjoying some refreshments afterward.

Would not take a serious photo with me.  But, yay, it's over!