health overhaul, in baby steps:

We've been taking our family's physical health more seriously lately, mostly with Manny's lead.  He's lost 20 lbs mostly by changing his eating habits alone.  I'm also eating more healthfully and drinking more water, but not much weight loss yet.  When I hit 35, my metabolism began to slow noticeably.  So I'm trying to cut back and eat snacks with protein or dietary fiber.  Here are some changes to our regular diet (making exceptions for special occasions/events, of course):

-Manny brings his lunch to work except Fridays.

-Little to no fast food, except sandwich shops and the occasional burger for Lucas (he needs them).    

-No soda.  Actually nothing with high fructose corn syrup.

-Reduce intake of bottled juice.  I dilute Lucas's juice 50/50 with water, and Naomi only likes citrus juices, so it was really Manny and I that needed to cut back. 

-Increase amount of colorful vegetables in our meals.

-Cut back on red meat and replace with omega-3-rich fish, beans, and poultry.  It's me that is the red meat eater, and I can't cut it out completely.  Manny could probably eat poultry all the time.

-Cut back on gluten and wheat in general.  This is more what Manny's doing.  The kids and I can't live without our 100% whole wheat bread, but I'm cutting back (a tiny bit).

-Cooking with healthier oils.  I do fry, but I don't deep fry and I no longer bread (cover in bread crumbs) any of our meats.

-Lean meats only.  Ground turkey instead of ground beef or pork.  

-Simple and purist approach--highlight good ingredients.

-No bakery goods from the store.  They all contain preservatives.

-Go for homemade as much as possible.  Everything from lemonade to soup.  The primary reason I had to go homemade was Manny's onion digestion problem, but now I find it to be more healthful as well.  I want to make homemade pasta, but I'm not there yet.  I buy organic pasta from Costco.

-Limit on candy (pretty much none) and dessert only once a day.

-Manny also wanted me to cut out snack chips, but I just try to buy ones with better and fewer ingredients.  I don't think they'd be the same if I made them myself.

-Vitamins.  Naomi is not on board with this.  She doesn't like concentrated fruit flavors (like jam, fruit roll-ups/leather, chewable or gummy vitamins) and not even those yummy chocolatey nutrition bars.  So with her, she just has to get it from what she eats until she learns to swallow pills with water.

We were already eating a lot of vegetables, having eggs instead of sugary cereal for breakfast, and avoiding creamy food.  I haven't use "Cream of..." in my cooking in years, except for the occasional surprise broccoli and stuffing casserole for Naomi with cream of mushroom in it.  I used to use lots of it (it has MSG, which makes it taste good), but now I find it's easier to cook without it.  Manny isn't a huge fan of creamy foods anyway (yet I'm Chinese and like it, same with salsa/chile and guacamole).  I like gravy, sour cream, and Mediterranean yogurt, but I guess it saves us money to hardly ever have to buy them.  We still do occasionally splurge or indulge, like I said, but we're trying to make a habit out of nutrition.

just us girls / focused friendships:

My friend O. took me out on a belated birthday date Saturday while my dear husband watched the kids.  She picked me up and treated me to a delicious lunch at Yardhouse and some Pinkberry frozen yogurt.  The truffle fries she introduced me to were so addictive, and then I had a half crab cake sandwich and organic tomato bisque.  There were actually about three hours between lunch and dessert where I was just following her lead, browsing shops at this outdoor mall, not knowing her intention was to see if there was something I wanted so she could buy it.  I just didn't really want anything other than to hang out.  In the end, she bought me this funny book called F in Exams, a compilation of actual students' clueless or intentionally humorous answers to real questions on exams.  I'd seen some before, but this book had more than I could imagine.  It was great for a laugh, better than what I'm reading now, which is the final book in the Hunger Games trilogy.  The first two books set a certain tone and pace, so I'm a little thrown off by the last book.  Perhaps that's what the author intended for the readers, but I couldn't put the first two down...and now I'm in no hurry to pick this one up.

Anyway, we had a great time.  It's fun to talk about life and what we're learning (and something other than potty training or baby products).  I missed her a lot in the years I sort of distanced myself because we weren't going to the same church anymore.  And yet when we decided to hang out again, it's like we picked up right where we left off.  Someone once told me that they focused on the relationships right in front of them, which made sense, but now I realize it's not who's in front of you, but who's got your back.  Another person said you can count all your real friends on one hand, and at the time, I was confused.  I used to think it wasn't right to have only a small circle of friends to confide in, but more and more so, I'm starting to understand how that is.  I used to truly treat most everyone the same, opening myself up completely if they'd allow it.  But I'm learning now that not everyone really wants that kind of relationship with me, or that what I say may make them stumble into judgment.  Maybe it's common knowledge, but for someone like me, it took a little longer to learn.  I get now that even if I don't like it, it's sometimes just how it is, and I can't always blame myself or another person for our not having a stronger connection.

Of course, I do still believe there are more close friends to be made.  I do also believe we should help, love, and share with everyone everywhere whenever we are able.  But with the limited time we have, we must ensure that what we're pursuing, especially if at the expense of our family, is truly worth it, truly what God wants (as led by the Spirit), truly for eternal rewards, and true to ourselves.  I spent so much time trying to break down walls that weren't going to go away.  But I would hope that nothing in my life is truly a waste.  It's always a challenge for me to express what I'm learning without all the details, but suffice it to say, I'm just glad I'm still learning.  And of course, I am incessantly thankful for those whom I can call my true friends.

I don't like this picture of me, but I like this picture of us.  :)

mom's birthday:

A friend took me out on a belated birthday date today, which was so sweet.  It was actually my mom's birthday.  I have always liked sharing a birthday month with her.  Yesterday I called to wish her a happy birthday in advance, but her F.acebook account had been hacked, so she was a little preoccupied.  It spammed the family with ads for checking out an adult dating site.  We had to change her password and delete the postings.  Maybe due to the abnormal activity from her account, no one posted a birthday message on her "Wall" this year.  Maybe they could have at least called or emailed.  There is always a deep sadness when I think about how close my cousins and the rest of the extended family are to each other, and my brother and I are pretty much strangers to most of them.

I was talking to her and Lucas kept saying, "Mike-a-Mike!" (what he calls Mike-and-Ike candy).  We wondered what made him think of that.  He told me, "When you talk Puo-Puo, you say a LOT of Mike-a-Mike."  I said, "What do you mean?"  He got in my face and said, "Mike-a-Mike-a-Mike-a-Mike-a."  Haha!  At that moment I figured out he meant "nuh-guh" which means "that" in Mandarin, which we use almost like the word "um."  Sometimes we'll say it repeatedly while thinking.  That's much better than him saying something else, because in all honestly it does sound a little like a racial epithet.

There's still the language barrier, so I don't force the kids on the phone.  I want to teach Naomi some more Chinese to say to her.  Teaching the kids anything other than English has been an uphill battle, but I haven't given up.  Naomi did try to say a couple things in Mandarin to my mom once, which she didn't really catch, but it gave me a glimmer of hope.  :)  My mom speaks English, but she has a hard time understanding it.  She went on to remind me about J.eremy Lin, and how he's fluent and can read and write even though he was born here, and how he went to Harvard first and did all his homework but put basketball second to honor his parents.  She hesitated a little on his faith, but then she mentioned that as well.  I'm thankful now on a personal level for his testimony.  It's even reached my mom to an extent.  I often pray that her heart could be opened completely, and not just in a passing moment.

children's museum:

A number of school districts had this week off, so we took the opportunity to do a field trip with a family we met through Naomi's classes.  We didn't take this week off ourselves from schoolwork, not even Monday, but I lightened the load a little by partitioning the math lessons.  Naomi is currently learning to add two-digit numbers in her head and several addends together, so I think it's good to take it slow and make sure she really gets it.  So far so good.  

We went to a children's museum, as suggested by our friends.  Naomi's friend E. and her little sister M. have about the same difference in age as our kids, so their mom knows that we have to sometimes juggle and prefer one child's interest over another.  We decided to not go upstairs to the little kids area so the older kids wouldn't have to just sit and wait for the younger ones.  We did split up about three times, because Lucas really likes to do a thorough job with everything while Naomi wants to move on and explore.  It certainly was easier with another parent there, although I'm also thankful for all the times Naomi and Lucas have had to learn to sacrifice their wants and prefer the other.    

After our friends left, I did end up taking Naomi and Lucas upstairs.  Naomi just waited with me in the first room.  The play market and kitchen were overrun with hoarder-types.  Lucas was a little more headstrong now, perhaps because there were younger kids.  In a crowded space, Lucas usually lets other kids get their way.  This time, Lucas was the one that wouldn't give up his things.  He had a stack of plates he found left by another child, and he felt they all belonged together.  When a swarm of children descended upon them, Lucas stomped after them and retrieved every last one.  I told him twice to share, but he protested that they all needed to be together.  So, unfortunately that ended up being the reason, or perhaps excuse, for me to take him out of there.  He protested until Naomi played up what was in the second room (I do tell her when it begins to border on manipulation :)).  Just as he was unwavering in his fascination with the bubbles and the water, he could not get enough of the sand.  We were there till five minutes before closing, and I had to pick him up and take him out.    

Lucas catching bubbles falling from an overhead bubble maker.

Always a favorite, Lucas sends lots of balls into the vortex while M enjoys getting splashed and eventually soaked.

The woolly mammoth skeletal replica; didn't intend for Lucas to be in the photo.  

Naomi building a story.

I kept calling these fossils, but later discovered that most woolly mammoth bones weren't exactly fossilized but preserved in their organic state.

This contraption shows how flowing bodies of water can uncover bones.

Pushing the pins.

Naomi built this "seesaw" in the building area.

Lucas in the driver's seat of the ambulance.

Making pizza with all he could find (those bins on the left start off full).  It worked out, though.  His favorite pizza is veggie.

Lucas putting sand in test tubes and funnels (and on the floor).

chinese new year festival:

Ok, last post, and then I'm all caught up.  Naomi and I went to a Chinese New Year festival at an outdoor mall.  I like to find any chance to encourage her to see her heritage, both Mexican and Chinese.  I also wanted to see the shows, but Naomi's feet started hurting from all the standing, so we didn't make it past the first hour.  Still, she was enthusiastic and learned a bit of her culture (even though the part we watched was mostly Vietnamese, but there were still many Chinese elements).

It was tough to get a good shot, but Naomi was able to take this one by standing on an outdoor table.

Martial arts demonstration.  They whacked that lamppost a couple times.  Probably weren't expecting the stage to be squeezed in like that.  :)

Naomi liked the pretty fashion show.  I couldn't get a shot of our favorite dress as there were video cameras going around her, but it was a beautiful pink gown with flowers (probably peonies) on it.

Naomi and the dragon float.

isp conference--social savvy:

We had our parent-teacher conference with the ISP principal last week.  I haven't been taking many photos of our work lately just because it's more complicated to upload and organize photos these days, but Naomi again did very well.  The principal asks her about topics I sometimes only mention in passing, like what a state capitol is, and Naomi still remembers many of them well.  

For whatever reason, Naomi decided to talk in a higher-pitched voice.  When I asked her about that, she said that when she talks in her normal voice, she sounds like an eight-year-old and would prefer to sound her age.  Haha.  The principal then said, "Oh, I've been meaning to tell you.  In all my years, I've not seen this degree of social savvy in another student, let alone many adults.  The other students are truly at a disadvantage."  Then she turned to Naomi, "But it's like a superpower--you can use it for good or evil."  I was thankful for the principal's observation, which I shared, and I also understood how some of that could be manifesting itself in her class.  I just cut to the chase about it, and we were able to discuss some areas of improvement which actually stemmed from her strengths.

I spent a lot of time discussing it with Naomi afterward and following an incident, I took some disciplinary action.  I was so happy to hear from the teacher afterward how helpful, cooperative, and encouraging Naomi was that day.  The teacher said she was a true team player.  I have never given up on Naomi.  As the principal and I discussed, her gifts just need to be channeled properly.  

Here is just a photo to show that Naomi is detail-oriented in her work.  The card is included in our curriculum, and Naomi always makes sure she has the closest shade possible from her box of crayons, sometimes imposing one color on another to get the right color and shading.  She rushes once she gets the colors right, though, and then asks me to white out where she's colored outside of the lines.  I'm trying to teach her to color it right to begin with rather than just fixing it later.  :)  

anniversary family day:

We didn't go to Monterey this year, but we had a great family day to celebrate our anniversary.  Manny planned a great afternoon.  First he took us to our favorite Taiwanese place for lunch.  It's changed so much from when we first started going there.  We haven't been there in a while, and now they have a hostess and a fancy menu with pictures, they accept credit cards, and they bring the check to your table.  There are still two workers I recognize from the early days (as in a decade ago), and we can still count on the same good food.  After lunch, we took the kids to the park.  It's always so much more fun with all four of us, and Naomi and Lucas play together more often now (as long as another kid doesn't steal her away).  It's always so nice when Manny has a day off.  No one even called from work.  Here's to 12 years of marriage and almost 7 years of parenthood!

Naomi with her sauteed beef udon.  She had some of everything.

Lucas ate everything, too.

Naomi loving her green apple slush.

Lucas had a berry smoothie.  "Mmm!  Yum yum!"

I had a green tea boba (only 99 cents!).  Lucas was bopping like crazy to the Asian pop playing in the background.

We all got on the swings at the playground.

Lucas holding on for dear life.

 

The kids and Manny climbing on the bar bridge.

12th anniversary:

Here we are, twelve years after we said, "I do."  Today was not particularly eventful--Manny repainted the grout in the kitchen and cleaned up the wood a little while I watched a lot of kids outside with a neighbor.  But there are some wonderful memories, and that's all today needs to be for me.  I'm short on time, so I'll post what I wrote on F.acebook already:

Happy 12th anniversary to my wonderful husband. I remember how we used to send ASCII messages on our Unix workstations, how you hardly ate vegetables, and how we were like two bags of bones. Now we send photos through our smartphones, you drink kale from a juicer, and we're not quite as skinny. :) We've been through changes, and traversed our share of mountains and valleys, and we’ve made it because our God has led us through it all. I look forward to seeing what He has in store for us. 

cards in the mail:

The kids and I were so happy to get cards in the mail.  We don't see that so much anymore.  My in-laws are the only ones who send me a physical birthday card nowadays, not counting cards that Naomi makes.  My best friend and mother call me, so I feel very special.  Plus, if you list your birthday on Facebook, you're guaranteed a lot of well wishes, each of which I appreciate.  (Also, Cynthia, thank you for the Valentine's card.  I love Valentine's cards especially, and I was super excited when we opened it.  You're an inspiration to me.)

Grandma, here is a video of the kids opening the cards (please excuse Naomi's craziness; we just returned from a party):


 

birthday, date night, valentine's:

We have a lot to celebrate in February--our anniversary, my birthday, my mom's birthday, Superbowl, Valentine's, Presidents' Day, and usually Chinese New Year (although it fell in January this year).  When I lived in the east coast, historical holidays like Lincoln and Washington's birthday, Groundhog Day, and Columbus Day were such a big deal compared to here.  Manny doesn't get MLK Jr. or Columbus Day off, but he does have Presidents' Day off.  We've been going to Monterey each year since it's around our anniversary, but this year we'll be enjoying our staycation at home and taking a trip later in the year.

The week of my birthday was a tough one in terms of sleep.  Whenever it rains, the kids don't sleep very well.  Lucas was wandering around at night, a little scared of being alone.  I was pretty exhausted by the weekend, but that didn't stop me from being excited about our date night, which was right after an already long day of errands and the housewarming party.  Our trustworthy family friend/babysitter L came over and watched the kids while we went out to see Red Tails (good movie with an 80s throwback feel) and have dinner.  We had a great time.

On Valentine's Day, I was out most of the day with the kids, so it was quite a rush to fix up a nice dinner, but I've learned that elegant can be easy as well.  I made a tender tri-trip, roasted rosemary baby red potatoes, and simple green beans.  The red velvet chocolate chip cookie sandwiches took the longest time with the cream cheese frosting filling, but they were a nice surprise for the kids.  I don't really have a sweet tooth, so I sometimes feel like throwing up looking at rich, sugary foods, but I was glad everyone else enjoyed them.

The kids and I came home to find these roses, a chocolate torte, and two movie tickets for me on my birthday.  Naomi said, "Whoa, Mom.  You've GOT to right Papi a thank-you note!"  Our friend said, "Yes, a thank-you note would be a good start!"

Lucas sharing a piece of cake with me at the Valentine's Day friendship celebration with Naomi's ISP.  She had another one at her dance class.  You can count on candy parties every two months in classes.  Naomi was very happy to get playdough, a pencil, and an eraser, so thank you to the parents who thought of those.

Not that many Taiwanese people I know like Thai iced tea, but it's one of my favorite drinks.

I pretty much didn't sleep all week with Lucas's constant waking, so I look a little tired, but we still cherished our evening together.

Red velvet chocolate chip cookie sandwiches with homemade cream cheese filling.

Naomi got all dressed up for dinner.  Lucas wanted to wear his pajamas.

Nice, quiet dinner with just the four of us.

j's birthday:

The kids and I went to J's 7th birthday party on Monday afternoon.  We hung out and had some snacks.  Then Naomi went with the other older kids and J's dad to the clubhouse for some games while Lucas and I remained behind.  Lucas spent most of the time eating.  The party was supposed to be at a park originally, but it rained rather heavily.  I think it was easier for us to be indoors, and the kids still got good use out of their rain gear on the walk to and from our car.  J turning seven means Naomi's birthday is not too far behind.  

Lucas feasting on loads of fruit, crackers, ham, and cheese.

J's grandmother got this cool 49ers cake for him.

Happy birthday!

Walking in the rain.

housewarming:

Manny's coworker had a housewarming party on Saturday.  I didn't know what type of event it was until it was too late since Manny was taking care of everything.  We showed up empty-handed, and I really felt terrible.  I felt like I forgot where I came from.  Anyway, the kids ate quite a bit and had fun outside in the backyard.  Manny chatted with this coworkers.  I didn't really know what to do with myself, plus I was super tired from not sleeping all week, so I just ate and took some photos.  We had a date night that night, so we had to leave in the afternoon.

Up until recently, I'd sometimes felt envious visiting people's houses.  We don't have much entertaining space and what we do have is still mostly stuck in the 70s, but I'm pretty content now.  Manny and I are on the same page--we want to live as we can afford, give to others, and invest in our children and health.  I'm thankful we were able to buy a place and still live comfortably within our means and on one income.  It was almost like one income to start, as my family had ruined my credit at the time, so we had to rely on Manny's credit.  Thankfully, their information is now removed from my records.  I still sometimes think about how nice it would be to update our floors and counters, but what makes our home a home is our family, our love for each other.  Barring some rude remarks from guests, we still enjoy having people over.  Of course, it's pretty nice having the bathroom and patio area redone, and I'm sure that lends to my contentment as well.  :)

We all ate well.  My phone cover is damaged, so the photos were blurry before I decided to take it off.

Manny conversing with coworkers in the backyard.

Lucas was happy with the two areas of stepping stones.

Naomi was really happy when her friend J arrived.

Lots of good food--noodles, fried rice, barbecue, salad, bread, and desserts.

The kids outside exploring.

Naomi loves backyards.

photo time (7 months' worth!):

I haven't been posting photo albums because now we have photos from three different sources that I had to sort through and arrange.  I finally got through them.  All the links should open the slideshow in a new window/tab.

July 2011 - 4th of July with friends, birthday parties, Manny's week off.

August 2011 - Stanford Open House, summer playdates and hike, parties, meeting up with friends.

September 2011 - BBQ, visiting family, L.A. Fair, classes, nature walks, DD concert, meet-ups with old friends.

October 2011 - Museum/Mission Field Trip, Pumpkin Patches, Halloween Carnival

November 2011 - Before Disneyland:  All Saints' Party, visits with friends, Manny's birthday.

Disneyland, Nov 2011 - Disneyland, Thanksgiving with my in-laws.

December 2011 - Christmas Field Trip, Winter Wonderland, visits with family and friends, Christmas Eve Party, H.untington Library.

January 2012 - MJ Immortal, mother-daughter date, planetarium field trip, Fairyland.

another great voice lost:

There's talk about how we idolize these celebrities for their talent while many die each day without all this honor, but the fact remains that people who have touched others' lives in any way will hold a special place in their hearts.  Whitney Houston was not my idol, but I loved her voice as a child, and she inspired me in the sense of breaking barriers and bringing a gospel voice to pop.  Her debut is the only record I ever purchased (everything else was on cassette and CD).  For a time, her music was clean and happy, and so was she.  Yes, people are saying they weren't surprised at her demise, but that makes it all the more tragic.  She was brought up in the church, her voice was a gift, and while she succumbed to drug abuse and poor decisions, I hope that the last song she ever performed, Jesus Loves Me, rang true for her as she entered heaven.

These were some songs that inspired me.  Greatest Love of All is what I leaned on as a lost and lonely child, although now I understand the greatest love is God, and not just me, but I still love the way she did this remake.

This was a song I liked as a teen, only finding out later it was about a girl who regrets an abortion.  She didn't write her own songs, but she sang them as if they were her own.

Favorite national anthem performance. It might have been lip-synced, but she's proven herself as a live singer many times.
 

Her soundtrack songs were among my favorites--"When You Believe" with Mariah Carey, "I Have Nothing" from Bodyguard, and "I Believe in You and Me" from The Preacher's Wife. My heart goes out to her family, especially her daughter.

new ways to play:

The weather's been fairly nice lately, so we've been out and about again.  I've been surprised at how much Lucas has matured in terms of playing independently at the park.  Naomi also learned how to pump herself on the swing.  I finally decided to take the time to teach her since imitating other children wasn't working out.    Most of what I learned as a kid I didn't learn from my parents but from trial and error and peer influence, but  I need to take advantage of teaching moments.  Plus it sure beats running back and forth between the kids.  I'm no spring chicken!

Lucas spotting ducks from the bridge.

This playground is totally old school, which makes it seem less safe, but it's the one the kids love.  Here's Lucas climbing all the way to the top of the slide.

It's very high and makes me nervous, but he'll just keep going up and down for a half hour nonstop.

This is Lucas actually swinging a little.  He dislikes the swing, but I was proud of him for wanting to try it again even for just a minute.

Near the park is a rec center, so Naomi goes to classes while Lucas plays at either of two playgrounds.

She goes very high and very fast, and loves it.

Naomi and a new friend built a pile of leaves to jump in.  I was not happy about the dirt, but sometimes kids need a little dirt.

Lucas making his way across the stepping stones by himself for the first time.