oahu, day 2 (diamond head):

On Day 2, we went to meet up with my friend G., an Oahu native, for breakfast.  He found this perfect place not too far from our hotel and made reservations for us.  It looked like a fairy tale house, and the food was pretty, too.  There was a "No Photos" sign at the glass door, and I wasn't sure if it was to prevent crowding there or if they really meant anywhere, so we took our group photos outside afterward.  I was still feeling ill, so I didn't scarf down my souffle pancakes as I normally would.  I think there was too much dairy for me.  They were incredibly fluffy, though.  Isaac wouldn't eat anything but the fruit on his crepes.  Then the rest of the week, he wanted banana and Nutella or chocolate all the time.

We were trying to figure out what to do afterward.  G. was willing to drive us somewhere in separate trips, but we had no car seat.  We had wanted to visit the Dole Plantation, but the shuttles would cost an arm and a leg.  So, we decided at the last minute to make Lucas' dream come true and hike up Diamond Head crater.  We went back to get changed and then walked to a bus stop.  It worked out well that G. was with us, because he could tell us how to get there, and he was also helpful when Manny ended up having to stay behind with Naomi.  G. took photos for us and helped me with the boys.  Naomi made it up about halfway, I think, before it got too narrow for her, and she didn't want to continue on.  All morning, she felt I was forcing her to go, and I thought she was just kidding about being afraid to die, but we made up at the end of the hike.  Interesting that she thought it was too high, but then went parasailing up 750 ft later in the week.  That's why I didn't take her fear as seriously as I should have at first.

I was worried Grandma and Grandpa would have a tough time with the hike, but they left us in the dust!  The rest of us were going at a snail's pace, as usual, and G. just went ahead or waited to try to access all of us as we were dispersed.  Grandma and Grandpa made it to the top, and then there are two more platforms that go higher if you climb the ladder.  I helped Lucas up the first one, and then he had a panic attack, so Isaac was the only one who made it up the second ladder to the top.  G. stayed with him there while I tried to peel Lucas off the ground and get him back down.  Once he started down, he took off.  G. again had to run ahead and catch up to him.  Thankfully we all could text and locate one another.

Isaac can now say he's completed four real hikes before the age of four (Castle Rock, Torrey Pines, that one Watsonville property, and now Diamond Head).  I've had to carry him for part of each one, but he's done the majority on his own.  Usually I just have to carry him down steep parts, although that can be quite difficult when it's slippery.  Diamond Head was actually the easiest one and yet the most rewarding.

Naomi shared a fresh coconut with me, and it was probably the best one I've ever had.  Once we drank all the water, they cut up the flesh in a circular, sort of rose pattern, for us to eat.  Then we got ready for the long walk back, once again with Isaac trailing behind and the grandparents speeding ahead.  Haha, how the tables have turned.  When we hiked about 7 (or was it 9?) of the 11 miles of the famous Kalaulau Trail in Kauai fifteen years ago, I ran way ahead on the way back.  I wasn't trying to make Manny's parents feel slow; I just really needed to use the restroom.  I don't know if they knew, but I guess they do now.

After that we just had dinner at Cheeseburger Waikiki by the hotel (another place Lucas wanted to go).  They serve those giant burgers that I have to eat with a fork and a knife, and mine was stacked even higher with bacon and a fried egg.  I used to stick my fist in my mouth to amuse people when I was young, but my mouth seems to no longer be as elastic.  I liked my burger even though I was slow to figure out how to consume it.  I was just thankful I could eat again.  I felt so much better already.  Manny, Naomi, and I got over our colds (finally) within a couple of days of being there.  Hawaii does a body good!

G. then had to head home.  It was good to see him in person after all these years.  The kids wanted to go to the beach.  We didn't make it out until nighttime, but it was still warm enough to be out in the water.  The closer beach was a calmer keiki (kids') beach, but the older two wanted more of a thrill.  More waves!  Calm is creepy!  They just played in the water for a half hour (not enough for Lucas), and we headed back.  We got to bed fairly late with just one bathroom for five people needing showers and baths, but we were finally starting to feel settled in.  Manny usually takes two or three days to adjust.  I try to stay out of his hair and take on however much I can those first days, but then I bottle up too much and either implode or explode.  Just keeping it real here.  Conflicts happen in daily life and even in paradise; it's how you deal with them that makes or breaks you.  Thankfully, we worked things out.

 Sweet photo of Manny's parents.

My lovely souffle pancakes.

We could not get a good shot of everyone at once, so I'll take the fall here with the wind blowing my hair in my face since everyone else looks good.  Isaac was camera shy.

I don't recall where this is, but we were en route to Diamond Head.

There's a long walk to get to the trailhead from the bus stop, made longer by Isaac's pace.  Grandma and Grandpa were long gone.

Naomi soon went ahead as well, before she decided to go back down with Manny.

Grandma says once she reached the tunnel, she wasn't sure she was going to make it, but Grandpa coaxed her on.

Finally caught up to the grandparents (because they waited).  One last flight of stairs to go!

Isaac going up the long flight of stairs between me and G.

Up we go!  G. took this photo, and most of the others up top.

So beautiful at the top.  Since we went mid-day, we caught the crowds and the heat.  It's better to go early or late, but it still worked out.

Thank you, G., for taking these great photos for us!

What a view!

Some proof that I was up there, too.  Lucas had a panic attack.

Isaac so proud to have gone all the way up.

Isaac with G.

Starting our trek back down.

Lucas telling me going down was easier and that he wanted to run ahead, which he did shortly after this.

Fresh coconut for us!

Yes, the beginning of a week of indulging in smoothies.

It was a nice day after all.

First time going to the beach at night.

But not enough waves, apparently.

oahu, day 1 (flight, night stroll):

Two Fridays ago, Manny called me and said that we had this tiny window where he was actually going to be able to get time off work coincident with Naomi's winter break, and that we should go to Hawaii.  In the conversation, we decided to go with Manny's parents to Oahu, where they'd been interested in going for years.  Fifteen years ago for our second anniversary, we went to Kauai with them.  Now we were returning for another island, with three kids in tow.  We were hoping Manny's sister could make it, too, but she had mandatory training at work.  His parents flew up here so we could all go together.  That Friday afternoon, I was scrambling and struggling to book the flights, hotel, and shuttles for us and his parents, and I still had a lot scheduled that day.

My heart wasn't in it.  I know it sounds crazy, but I had a lot of fears initially.  In addition to the stress of only having a day to book and a week to clean, prep, reschedule or rearrange so much, and pack, I felt like I was barely emotionally healing from last year, and our family was in such a fragile state.  It's also hard, at least it is for me, to be responsible for so many people while traveling.  Three of us were also sick, and I've been out of shape for a while.  Could we really make this happen?  Something I've come to understand is that a family vacation shouldn't be considered an escape from our issues--we just take them with us.  However, it ended up being an amazing trip for all of us.  I wouldn't have minded staying longer, even though I was originally trying to convince Manny to keep the trip short.

We'd considered the Disney Aulani, and my friend who works for Disney could get us a discount, but there weren't rooms available.  I dug this coupon out of my email trash folder for 20% off a stay at a Hawaii Hilton.  The reservation had to be booked by 9 pm that night, and I barely made it.  Most Hiltons will not accept three children in one room, but the Doubletree Hilton Alana had suites that could hold us.  It was half the price of the hotels closer to the main beach without all the noise and traffic.  They even gave us a Pack and Play that Isaac could sleep in (when he was willing to).  The airplane ticket prices were very expensive for Presidents' Day weekend, so we flew out Sunday instead of Saturday to save a little.  However, we did pay a little more so that we wouldn't have to have a layover in Seattle or Phoenix.  With our kids, it's easier to go non-stop.  On the way back, there wasn't a non-stop flight, but there was one with a quick layover in Maui, so that wasn't bad at all.

We did some shopping for the trip, but there wouldn't be enough time to buy too much clothing, and I also didn't really want to.  Thankfully, Naomi just received a number of summer hand-me-downs from our friend.  I had some clothes given to me by a friend.  The boys also had not grown that much since the end of last summer, so they were able to still fit in their swim trunks and a few warm-weather clothes also given to them by others.  I really didn't have the time, energy, or funds to think of having everyone in matching aloha shirts or whatever.  I don't mind that my kids often wear hand-me-downs or clothes I get at a huge discount or free through my awards points--saving is what allows us to afford trips like these.

So, on the day of our 17th wedding anniversary, we left for Hawaii early in the morning.  The current time difference until Daylight Savings Time begins is two hours behind us, so it was an easy time difference for us.  Maybe not so much for Manny's parents, who got up at 2:30 a.m. sometimes.  We arrived safely and happily, although it was a tough plane ride with Isaac, who couldn't nap and had gone to bed at midnight the night before and then gotten up at 6:30.  Thankfully the boys could be separated.  In the plane, there are seven seats across, so that was perfect for us taking up exactly one row with the boys at the window seats on either end.

The plane did not have in-flight entertainment, except one could rent an iPad, which we didn't.  So for six hours, I was Isaac's entertainment.  Sometimes I let him play on my phone while I read this short autobiographical novel called The Circuit by Francisco Jimenez about the life of a migrant worker family.  Naomi read it in school.  She said it reminds her so much of my childhood, and I hadn't even told her that much, so there was even more than she knew.  The similarities were almost mind-boggling to me.  I can see how much more similar my life was to Mexican farm workers than the typical Taiwanese immigrants who came in with good jobs and money.  (Spoilers:  Like Panchito, we had to constantly move due to my dad having to find work without a green card; I struggled so much early on in school with being poor and not knowing English; we went to the thrift store and trash to find things for our home; I even also had two birds that my dad accidentally killed because they were too noisy.)  One difference we had, though, was that his family was full of children and close-knit, while mine was just myself and my brother and distant and dysfunctional.

We arrived in the early afternoon.  We were all excited.  Honestly, I had barely slept, had cramps, was recovering from a cold, and wasn't in the best mental state, but the thought of not having to be in rush-hour traffic or cook or clean or teach all day was certainly invigorating.  That warm air that welcome us and the sight of that beautiful ocean probably helped, too.  😊

I already knew that Oahu is more developed and populated than the other islands.  But it wasn't nearly as trashy as some reviewers made it out to be.  It was very clean, as a matter of fact, and coming from the places I grew up, the graffiti was nothing.  Because my hands were often full with the kids, I had no time to really take photos of people going about their lives or the buildings, which I'd originally planned.  Nope, it was more like, hurry up!  Point and shoot!  Someone blinked?  Oh well, too bad.

I had two longtime friends I really wanted to see, so I was also trying to coordinate some time to meet with them around their work schedules.  I was so glad we ended up being able to visit with them, although not at their homes.  A rental minivan would have been very expensive and apparently hard to find.  The hotel charges $40 a night to even park there.  So we decided to forego the rental.  Our friends both offered to shuttle us, but neither had a car seat, and we opted not to bring ours.  So we just met up where we could and traveled by public bus, shuttle, trolley, and mosly on foot.

The first night, we walked around I think for two hours, maybe more, before eventually settling on Hard Rock Cafe.  I was wondering if the rest of the week was going to be like this, but it really wasn't.  We had some amazing food thanks to many recommendations and some serendipity (which I consider God's providence).  Naomi is my foodie, so she got to enjoy all kinds of island foods, except she missed out on the Dole whip.  Lucas really wanted to eat at Cheeseburger Waikiki the first night, which was next to our hotel, but Manny didn't want to.  We ended up eating there and at a sister restaurant twice that week with our friends.

Manny and I don't really mind walking everywhere, but I had to carry Isaac and keep Lucas from drawing him into the streets.  By week's end, my foot that had never fully healed was throbbing, and I felt like my back was tied in boating knots.  No one else could carry him for very long.  Maybe we should have brought the stroller after all, but it would have been challenging to take everywhere.  I guess it was good exercise and a reminder to get back in shape!

Wheels up!  Naomi had a little Stitch doll she used as a neck pillow.

Isaac would not sleep, no matter how hard I tried.  Glad I let him pack the toys he wanted to bring, like this Hoberman sphere (thank you, G, for reminding me what it's called).

Isaac loved the view.

I used to bring these Earplanes ear plugs for the other two, but their ears didn't bother them too much on the plane.  I didn't bring them this time, and Isaac's ears were really hurting.  Sucking on these sugar-free lollipops helped a little.

Approaching Honolulu!

A quick stop at Starbucks at the airport.

Our hotel room.  We had two queens, the sofa bed, and a pack and play.

A painting of whales on a building.  I used to be really into marine life paintings.

We got the city view, which actually was great for the kids.  Maybe someday we'll stay by the beach, but I was happy here.

Trolley to Waikiki!

Duke Kahanamoku statue.  It's the same thing anywhere:  Isaac!  Isaac!  Nevermind.

Grandma and Grandpa.

Strolling along the beach, still looking for a place to eat that isn't too long of a wait.

Settled on Hard Rock Cafe, but it was nice to sit outside at night on the second floor and have my island fish tacos.  Kids had been up from 6:30 a.m. till past midnight our time and did well, all things considered.

back to life, back to reality:

Not really--we took life and reality with us to Hawaii.  We just returned from a week-long trip to Oahu with Manny's parents.  Can't wait to share our experiences and photos.  We had many highs and many lows.  It is very different and challenging traveling with children, especially when Lucas doesn't deal well with change and environment.  However, Lucas loved Hawaii so much, he's dreaming now of living there someday.  You couldn't tell that by how many meltdowns he had all week, and I'm talking nuclear level.  Tomorrow, we're right back to the grind of school, work, etc.  But we've made lasting memories.

fire / valentine's:

On Monday morning, Manny accidentally bumped into a knob on our stove before leaving for work.  It's easy to bump it; we'd even been warned by the salesman when we'd purchased it.  If you bump it just a little, it goes to ultra high heat.  I've bumped it myself while washing dishes, but usually I'll see the light turn on immediately.  The night before I was finishing the dishes and set a pan and a couple of spatulas on top.  I got called away and couldn't finish (we'd had a long day, and it was already 10:30 at this point).  I think the pan had oil in it, and then the wooden spoon on top just grew the fire.

That morning, I'd dropped Naomi off and gone upstairs to be with Isaac when I heard the beeps.  We had just switched out the old smoke alarms; I didn't recognize the sound and couldn't tell it was coming from downstairs, but then I smelled the smoke.  I ran down and saw the fire, which wasn't horrible (hadn't hit the cabinets yet), but was bigger than any fire I'd experienced in my home before.  The house was filling with smoke, and I ran to open the garage and put the birds out.  I could imagine Naomi being so heartbroken if she lost her birds, and they are very sensitive to fumes.  I ran to pick up Isaac and called to Lucas to hurry out, and he crawled out and stayed low to the ground and covered his nose as best as he could.  I was proud of him for remembering.  I put the boys and the birds close to our meeting point but within the open garage, because I still wanted them close.  Isaac saw the fire and screamed, "I'm scared!."  Same reaction as when we had the accident.  And like with the accident, I felt calm and at peace.  I was focused on keeping everyone safe.

I grabbed my oven gloves and tried to put the fire out with a large lid, which will usually deprive a flame of oxygen, but the fire was too large.  I tried a pan, then a larger pan, and then decided to forget it and grab the fire extinguisher.  Two sprays and the fire was out.  But what a huge mess.  One reason I'd only want to use the extinguisher as a last resort is because we'd have to get another one.  A bigger reason is that the dry chemical gets everywhere.  Two of our newer spatulas were incinerated, and the heat melted part of our pressure cooker (thankfully it's cosmetic and still works fine) and other things.  The clean-up was hard, but I got through about four hours of it, and then Manny came home to help me for the other two, which really helped.  I still got chicken cacciatore made thanks to the Instant Pot.  But the day was long, with a huge to-do list on top of our usual routine and, yeah, the fire.  It was a long night, too.  I also tripped and fell down the stairs a little when I got distracted by a spider.  It's amazing how I can be calm in emergencies and major trials, but panic so much at the littlest things and fear of things that haven't even happened.  If it's big, I know God is bigger, but if it's smaller, I don't trust in Him enough.

I didn't realize till later I'd cut finger and slightly burned another.  I also didn't realize until Isaac said, "Mommy, you saved my life!" how much it impacted the boys.  Isaac brought up the car accident.  But it was a good time to review fire and vehicle safety with him.

Valentine's Day started off much better, except that Lucas threw up.  He doesn't usually get stomach problems, so we were worried he was catching what Naomi and I had.  However, he's been perfectly fine since.  I think he just ate too early, and I had given him chocolate Cheerios and plums, and I think it's more sugar than he's used to having for breakfast.  It's so unfortunate, too, because he didn't make it to the restroom, so after the clean-up, the huge brown stains are still there.  I still had a lot to clean and do in prep for some upcoming things, but I had already made simple plans for Valentine's dinner, so figured I'd follow through.  Isaac helped me dip some strawberries in chocolate and did a great job,  I made steak, potatoes, risotto, and salad.  I don't know if I like risotto made in the Instant Pot as much, but it's certainly easier than standing over the stove stirring.  I'd also bought some chocolates.

We celebrate Valentine's Day and many other holidays but do not go all out.  Just like Christmas and Easter, it's a pagan holiday that the church took over and tried to make more "Christian."  But holidays really can be whatever you make of them.  Some people just call it "Love Day" and celebrate all kinds of love, like family, friends, even love of self.  Others have started celebrating "Singles Awareness Day" because, hey, they matter, too.  I know the feeling--there used to be these Valentine grams with roses you could send to a good friend or even a crush at school, and I never got one.  Our Bible study in college had a Valentine's banquet to build our unity, and probably to have an excuse to dress up.  Valentine's also holds wonderful memories for me.  We got engaged at midnight on Valentine's Day (the start of February 14, not the end).

Valentine's is a somewhat cheesy holiday, so it lends itself well to little fun activities with the kids.  Plus, I can pretty cheesy anyway.  I wrote little compliments on cut-out hearts and put them all over Naomi's door.  My main love language is "words of affirmation," although I think I'm receptive to all the love languages.  Naomi is more about quality time, but she was so happy when she saw her door.  For our family, it's a chance to say, "Hey, I love you, but I love you every day, and we love because He loves us.  I hope you know that."

After dinner, I learned that a friend from church lost her daughter suddenly on Valentine's Day.  Life can completely change in just one moment.  Her heart is completely shattered, and yet she has determined to turn her tragedy into purpose for her daughter, but even more for Christ.  I got to witness and be part of women praying for her, comforting her, and just surrounding her with love and support.  Love.

The aftermath.

An oven glove next to the one I used to grab a lid to try to put out the fire.

We got a swing, and the budgies like to sit on it together.

Almost five-year age gap and opposite personalities make for a lot of conflict, but also a lot of love between these two.

They are ready for vacation!

He asked me to take a sunglasses photo with him, and I obliged.

Having a chocolate-covered strawberry.

Lucas saw this at Ross, and I could tell he wanted it.  It was $5.99, and since he put it back without asking, I got it for him.  He wanted it on the fireplace.  The kids "love" it.

birthday surprises:

Good surprises first:  Two days before my birthday, Manny came home from work with a bouquet of flowers and a cake from the Korean bakery.  It was a double surprise, as we usually go out to eat.  Sometimes Manny gets me flowers, and sometimes he doesn't.  I never really know.  The kids all joined in singing happy birthday, and we enjoyed our time together.  It was too brief for Isaac, though.  He kept telling everybody to come back and asked why the party was over.  I guess he's used to longer kids' parties.  I just told him I'm a grown-up and get tired more quickly and don't need more.  That might be more because I'm introverted than because I'm an adult, but I didn't want to talk about it too much.

On my actual birthday, we found out that his job transfer was going to go through.  He's been trying to get this transfer for a very long time.  I think that as hard as it was, the wait was good for us.  I came to a place of contentment and trusting God.

I also received a couple birthday cards in the mail.  I appreciate them very much, especially since they're not so common anymore.  I also enjoyed all the online well wishes.  Even if they would only remember due to the Facebook notification, it's the same for me most of the time, and I appreciate their taking the time to drop a note.

Now for the not-so-fun surprises.  I woke up at 3 a.m. the day before my birthday feeling very nauseated and with a bad stomachache.  I didn't want to wake anyone up by throwing up, so I held it until about 7 a.m.  It was a rough day with a busy schedule.  I had bodyaches, so driving was painful, but I also could make as many pit stops as I probably needed to, and that was really painful.  I really did not want to go to church that night, but I would drop Naomi off if she wanted.  But sadly, she came down with the stomach flu, too.

On my birthday poor Naomi was really sick but tried to muster up the energy to help me, which I declined.  We were both in bad shape.  She had to miss school, too, which is always hard, because you don't always know what you missed, and it's hard to catch up.  But she doubled up and made it through.  The teacher was going to give her an extension for a quiz, but she chose to take it anyway (and got 100%).  The grade is good, but I'm proud that she chose not to take the easy way out.

Lucas started the day off okay, but quickly went into a defiant mode when he accidentally bent his paper.  He is what some would consider a neat freak when it comes to his writing and coloring, because that's his "thing."  For certain kids, things often seem to not make sense or be out of their control, and they then put a lot of emphasis on the things they can do well.  He also gets wrapped up in video games, and I think it's a similar reason.  In the end, he came around, and we did what we could before he had to go to his group therapy class.

The day after my birthday I received a huge surprise, but I won't be able to tell you more about it for a couple of weeks.

Even though 40 was the big milestone year, I feel like 41 is going to be a bigger, brighter, better year for me.  There's nothing like seeing sunshine again, and I appreciate it more after making it through last year's storms.  Bad or good, it's all for good in the end.

Wow!

Pretty flowers (I love purple) and Asian cake (I love Asian cakes).

Thank you, Manny!  Thank you, Jesus!

super bowl and a.'s party:

Last Sunday would have been a good one to stay indoors and stay dry while watching the Super Bowl, but then there's Naomi's social calendar (and some of mine, too, I guess).  Manny had to pick her up from church when the campers returned, and then he took her soon after to her friend's candle-making party.  It was close to her birthday, but it wasn't exactly a birthday party, because her mom doesn't like her to have them, so she just paid for it herself.  Naomi had a lot of fun.  It took me about an hour to get from the park where I went with our missionary friends after their gathering to the candle place.  I still got there ten minutes early.  It was pouring and dark on the way home.  One section of the road has no lamps or streetlights, so that can get a little scary for me.  Manny watched some of the game and made shredded barbecue chicken for sandwiches.  We didn't do a lot otherwise, and it was definitely not a family day.  When Naomi and I got back, Isaac said he was tired of watching football.  It was a historic game, and I was glad I caught the end of it at least.  I just watched the ads later, and most were just so-so (and thankfully no puppymonkeybaby or the like).  The halftime show was pretty entertaining.  I don't follow Gaga that much, but she seems pretty hardworking and talented.  Manny has a friend who's a huge Patriots fan, and he actually went to the Super Bowl.  I'm sure that comeback was ecstatic for him.  I wasn't really rooting for either team, but it was a good game.

Getting the wax ready for her candle.

Naomi's finished product, a coffee and vanilla scented candle.